SCENE: I am tidying some things in the fridge after our trip to the pediatrician, who has recommended -- quite possibly mainly as a strategy to give me something to feel proactive about -- that I not eat dairy for a bit, in case it is contributing to Jane's slightly suboptimal digestive performance. (Oh boy! Digestion!)
I come across a nice plump package of my favorite tortillas, which we normally use to make breakfast quesadillas.
"Ohhh." I go get a hug from Steve.
"What's the matter?"
"I'm a little sad about dairy products," I explain, dripping tears on his shoulder.
"I think you'll be able to have them again soon, you know."
"Yes, I know. And I don't even really care that much, it's just that all the nice little routines I was happy about resuming seem to involve dairy." Tears leap out of my eyes and puddle on his shirt.
"I really don't mind very much," I reassure him, truthfully, in sensible tones, sobbing all the while.
"I promise I am not experiencing feelings of hopelessness." I put my head down on the counter and weep shamelessly.
Two minutes later, I stop and feel entirely better.
Here's what I want to know: Is it possible that there is actually something in my system that I need to excrete through crying? It is an excretion, after all. The internet tells me that emotional tears contain prolactin, which I certainly have in abundance at the moment.
Can it really be the case that every once in a while you wind up with too much and your body deals with it by making you cry about dairy products? Tell me, is this insane? Is it something everybody knows to be true? What's the deal? I would really like to hear your views on this question.
Excess pregnancy hormones leaching from your eyes?
Posted by: Jen RE | 03/08/2010 at 09:04 PM
This theory makes much more sense than anything in any evolutionary psychology article or book I've ever read, and so YES, it must be TRUE and NOT INSANE. But I don't think everyone knows it (until now).
Posted by: Ray Davis | 03/08/2010 at 10:56 PM
"Prolactin is not the only stress hormone, after all. In all likelihood, men have higher concentrations of other stress-related hormones than women. It could be, instead, that men discharge of their stress by different channels. Men tend to sweat more than women, and sweat contains many of the same chemicals as tears. Perhaps their sweating reduces men's stress in a fashion comparable to women's crying. Men might also urinate more, another way to rid the body of built-up waste products.... (Men's evolutionary tendency for increased excretion efficiency over women is evidenced by the way they urinate. In the heat of the jungle, pursuing a wooly mammoth, it pays not to have to sit down to pee.)"
Oh my gosh. That poor... overdressed... wooly... mammoth... running... and running... in the heat of the *sniff* jungle....
Posted by: Ray Davis | 03/08/2010 at 11:03 PM
If restricting dairy is making you unhappy, I would feel free to disregard your pediatrician and do what you like. I think there's a strong tendency among a lot of doctors and other busybodies to view messing with a breastfeeding woman's diet as a harmless, cost free intervention, so there's no reason not make sweeping changes on the off chance that it might do something useful. And it's really not free. If you're unhappy, that's not good for you or the baby.
(Not, of course, that there's no relation between the mother's diet and the baby's reaction to her milk -- if you notice something, then cutting back on the offending foodstuff is reasonable. But I find it really difficult to believe that the pediatrician has actually diagnosed that a week-old baby is bothered by dairy in your diet, rather than merely throwing stuff at the wall to see what sticks on the theory that it'll keep you busy.)
On the crying, I remember it as feeling mostly like it was about sleep deprivation, which always makes me mercurial.
Posted by: LizardBreath | 03/09/2010 at 11:12 AM